“Well, Watson, Ms. Stoliz appeared in the doorway like a lovely version of a wraith shortly after you left. Indeed, as I was involved in my studies, I actually mistook her for your premature return. Since you were out on the errand on which I sent you, I had no door greeter and lacked the proper kind of screening necessary to filter those who come in the office on desultory, impulsive urges. Ms. Stoliz, has, so far, provided the outlines of a case she feels that I am a good fit for, and it involves, somewhat ironically, the labyrinth machinations of the church both as a political and spiritual entity.”
Watson, despite his best efforts, let out a small chuckle. “It seems divine intervention is not going to allow you to simply enjoy your tobacco without making the proper abeyance and contrition. Maybe this is interest on the divine account ledger for not attending Christmas services!”
Holmes was becoming annoyed. Watson seemed to be keen on provoking him with some mystical bait today as to put him into a boxing ring with God on the grounds of God being beyond reason to understand.
“You know, Mr. Watson, I have often observed that people tend to attribute to others the types of problems they have not worked out in themselves. Since you insist on supernatural conversation this day, then I am obligated to suppose that where reason is involved you fancy that I must, in one way or another, consider myself to be at odds with spiritual beliefs. As I have clearly indicated, what my beliefs are or are not are of no consequence in terms of outcomes where being a detective is involved. However, it seems to me that those who have not sharpened the powers of reason are often keen, when they see someone else that has, on assuming the other party believes by taking the time to sharpen the intellect that they are somehow superior. Indeed, such a person IS superior, in terms of having taken the time to sharpen the tools that God gave them. On the other hand, a lazy person puts his or her tools in the shed and allows them to rust. When they see someone else in the garden with implements that are well maintained, perhaps they are seized with a kind of neglectful guilt. If the person with the well kept tools happens to be a superlative gardener, then I submit it is entirely possible that the neglectful person is reminded that they have not so invested their time and so what at first appears to be observation is, in fact envy. Since there is no way the other party can humble the prepared garden servant from their own example, they resort instead to a kind of divine intervention where they attempt to get God to do the kind of work for them that they themselves do no wish to undertake. In that God is going to be the MOST superior version of anything, then the hope is that the person who has taken the time will exhibit some modicum of pride which of course is a venal sin. Then, the lowly, slovenly servant can rejoice in himself that he has tricked the prepared person out of his rightful praise by putting him instead at odds with the Almighty.”
Watson looked momentarily stricken. “I should hope that you do not think so negatively about me, Mr. Holmes. I was only teasing you as I have never seen you in church.”
“Indeed, Mr. Watson, teasing sometimes is good-natured, and sometimes it is coming from recondite, darker motives unknown even to the teaser. I have solved many crimes where the person who committed the deed was a mystery even unto his or her self. Sometimes the party in question knows exactly why they are doing a deed, but they lack a deeper understanding of what is driving them to do it in the first place and so leave little clues scattered about like a careless child lost in a world of imagination leaves their toys about their environs.”
Watson’s face had fallen.
Ms. Stoliz was becoming visibly uncomfortable at watching this psychological evisceration of Watson’s motives.
Holmes was aware of both issues. He therefore tactfully added, “But of course, Mr. Watson, I am sure your teasing was of the kind that only comes from a place of Platonic kinship and brotherly devotion. I should, however, like to avoid this kind of kidding as it appears that whatever it is that Ms. Stoliz is about to reveal is of a nature that will most likely knock the joy out of the more jovial people in the world.”