Midnight Pub

I honestly don't feel accomplished.

~aei

It has been around 3 weeks since have got done with finals. I didn't have much hope for it honestly, but grades turned out to be a lot better than I was expecting it to be. I don't feel any sort of accomplishment, though. Just feeling this "oh I don't need to worry about this now" feeling for an hour or two then forgetting about it.

I've been feeling this a lot recently with summer, especially as I was trying to branch on to more things, but it all feels like just another weight off my shoulder. It lead me to cancel a lot of my personal plans, as I wasn't convinced like it would make any positive impact.

This sounds like a toxic mindset but I would rather work on something with passion and motivation, because I know that if I force myself I'll end up doing it worse.

On another note, I scored a 157 in raads-r test. Not really sure how to feel about it but I may reattempt it since I'm still not confident about it.

I feel like it's too high for me but it would very well explain my inability to maintain a single decent connection with anyone in a way that doesn't feel forced.

I don't have anyone to share any of this with so I felt like drinking it off would be more tolerable than bottling it up.


indoors

Sounds like standard burnout. You've spent a lot of time hyperfocused on your school work, and now you must work on your mental recovery.

Congratulations on finishing your finals. It's a mountain to trek and there are a lot of frozen bodies on the path.

To your next mountain! Cheers!

        * o
  nnoOno.
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