hello again.
it's been a while since I last wrote here. life's been..what life usually is. it's messy, hectic, and quite unpredictable. my bachelor degree is coming to an end, so most of my days have been filled with daydreaming about what's to come next. I've also written a few yearbook entries for a few friends! it all makes me feel the finality of this semester.
this feeling started around almost last august. I got punched in the face with the finality of this year. of course, I won't delay my graduation to keep living this life, that would be stupid. besides, my friends would be gone so there wouldn't be the reason to stay anyway. what I'm trying to say here I guess is that I'll miss this life. the dream of living with my friends, the perpetual sleepover, is almost over. every day, at some point, I'm reminded of this. every "good night" makes this more apparent. we have only so many of them left before we, more or less permanently, finish this era of our lives.
what will come after? I don't know yet. some friends of mine are working part-time already. some are applying to master's programs. I fall into the latter category, but the waiting is quite hellish. eh, that's fine. we'll see what comes out of it. for now though, I'll try to make sure that these last few months are well lived. through all the hell this university has put me through, I can still thank it for giving me friendships that I believe will stand the test of time.
in 2-3 months, hopefully I'll return to this pub, on a warm june night, with a slight breeze in the air. I'll be in my graduation gown, staring out of my dorm room for the final time. I'll check every cabinet at least 3 times. I'll switch on the desk lights, for old times' sake. if my roommate is still there, it will be a long night of bittersweet fun. if not, I'll most likely be going my own way, bawling my eyes out during the ride.
I don't know what I was expecting during the start of my bachelor's degree. I don't think it was even close to this. I can say that it was well worth it.
take care friend.