Midnight Pub

"nothing's gonna change my world"

~tffb

I sat in boredom, and I lay silently, sick with the tonality of my life quality being fairly low. It's been this way for some time, so it is what it is. But I started on meds that work ok, so there's some "clarity" coming back to my brain.

Then I went and put on Tidal and put on The Beatles song (mostly Lennon) of "Across the Universe", which upon hearing it for the first time, seemed like somehow he, Lennon, just *manifested* pure beauty into this world via guitar. What a track!

And the lyrics "nothing's gonna change my world" rang true this evening. Nothing IS going to change my world - new habits are being formed, starting to attend a "working program" of sorts, and also talking to more neighbors, so I'm glad about all of that.

Still "nothing's gonna change my world" - the "overall", the "base" of my world/life just *is* as it *is*, and that's how it is.

Onto more evening :)

A coffee, ~bartender? Thank you


inquiry

Damned amazing song.

I was a huge Lennon fan growing up.

Late in high school I went to a Baptist church with the high school girlfriend, and a couple years later I was attending what I imagine must be the premiere fundamentalist Christian university.

I was on a cleaning crew there one night when during lunch break one of the others said something like "Did you hear John Lennon was shot tonight?"

I didn't want to sound too interested fear mild fear of revealing some past big time idolatry. So I waited a bit, and said something like "Oh? Shot?"

"Yep. Shot an killed...."

I finished my shift in a daze that may have bordered on coma, came back to my dorm room (FOUR roommates...) and played radio stations definitely forbidden by the university, especially at something like 2:00am.

That was the beginning of the end of high-end religiosity for me. I started reviving Beatles songs on pianos in small practice rooms, sorta kinda begging to get caught performing "worldly" music.

And of course I can remember the scene where "I learned the news today, oh boy" as though it were yesterday.

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tffb

Posts meander like a reply text inside a Midnight box... ;)

I'm sorry for the bad memories in that regard, Inquiry. Lennon was intrinsically talented and a good force in the world, sincerely.

I was three years "to be" when Lennon was taken from us (as I was born in 1983). But growing up I heard The Beatles and Lennon's solo stuff, of course. I missed out on the actual *presence* of his time, though. The music carries through, though, indeed.

Also, I didn't know you attended a Christian college. Have you ever been, or are you now, a "man of the cloth"? A believer or former-believer in theology? I, myself, sort of see myself as a either a "former Catholic" or "non-practicing Catholic" - or both, or neither. As I attended a Catholic school 1-4 grade, but then was quite happy to attend a public school in another state in 5th grade when me and the family relocated for my Father's job at the time. I was learning both Science (traditional Science) AND Computer Science simultaneously at that school, as the former was not taught at all in the previous school, and the latter was relatively new to ALL schools (I would imagine - it was 1993, and hadn't heard of a lot of "computer courses" going on in that era outside of folks in college).

But since then, I more or less stayed away from religious trains of thought, as I "did all that" when I was young, and the subject hasn't appealed much to me in the years since.

Anyway, hope you're well.

And ~bartender, another coffee, if I may? I am having one now but two is better than one!

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inquiry
> Posts meander like a reply text
> inside a Midnight box... ;)

Nice!

> Also, I didn't know you attended
> a Christian college. Have you ever
> been, or are you now, a "man of the
> cloth"? A believer or former-believer
> in theology? I, myself, sort of
> see myself as a either a "former
> Catholic" or "non-practicing
> Catholic" - or both, or neither.

Raised Catholic, but never too serious about it.

The Baptist thing, though.. hit that pretty hard for a few years. Got a best friend involved too, which might have saved his life from lotsa chemicals at the time. That's how he frames it, anyway.

Never a man of the cloth, though.

> But since then, I more or less
> stayed away from religious trains
> of thought, as I "did all that"
> when I was young, and the subject
> hasn't appealed much to me in the
> years since.

I'm in the habit of trying to distill commonality from various religions/paths/ways (e.g. bible, sutras, this and/or that mysticism, more modern stuff (e.g. Daniel Dennett)).

One fundamental conclusion is that words get in the way of The Way. :-)

> Anyway, hope you're well.

Same to you!

Monday I drove several hundred miles to fetch my father and bring him here, where he'll be staying for a little over a week. *Extremely* good times so far. Tons of reminiscing, filling in mysterious blanks, etc. Lots of tears, too. All good.

Yesterday and today are especially intense, as my wife went off to visit with a daughter, so it's just the old man and I. Fabulous, but he's rather ailing, so there's a certain undercurrent of sadness as The End nears. (Of course, in this Murphy's-Law-burdened world, I could easily be the one that passes first.... ;-) )

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tffb

I hear ya on the religion sentiment, I just don't delve into or spend a lot of time on the subject (theology) anymore. Same goes for philosophy or any form of high-minded thinking, because I sort of feel I've "been there", too.

Enjoy the times with Inquiry Sr, Inq ;) When my old man was "moving on", his ailments and physical condition had become all but unbearable - for him to experience, and for us (me and the fam) to witness. Some people "pass away" before they are actually deceased, and that was sort of the way with my Father, and it was flat out mortifying. I'm recovered/ing and doing better now, and I put all those days behind me, so as I say: Upward and onward!

Until later, Inq...

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inquiry
> I hear ya on the religion sentiment,
> I just don't delve into or spend a
> lot of time on the subject (theology)
> anymore. Same goes for philosophy or
> any form of high-minded thinking,
> because I sort of feel I've "been
> there", too.

Nevertheless, you and others that chance upon this reply might find

Posthumous Pieces

some fun reading.

(Do note the "next" links at the bottom of pages.)

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tffb

Nice. I'll try not to join the varsity on that one anytime too soon, lol!

Though as experience (and simple facts of reality) have shown, the chances of me rolling a "7" on getting some stuff I wrote noticed "en masse" while I still roam the Earth is about as likely as that same "7" filling my bank account with Octuple digits. I'm not holding my breath, and the desire for which isn't much there anymore, either.

So, in regards to the Posthumous Pieces thing, I wouldn't mind much if something/anything gained more than a little attention after I'm gone - but still, I wouldn't reap the benefits of such, so I'm fine with just "trudging on" and adding to the word heap with reckless abandon until then.

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