Midnight Pub

can you hear it, calling in the air tonight. hold on


Strange. I have been miserable for months. Badly at the start of 2023. Still 1/3 of that.

Oddly, I get a perception that my neighbors are equally as miserable.

No reason for them to NOT be. They're loners/no one's, like me, and I am scurrying down to Farmington Missouri in June, bless, so I won't have this disposition. Rehab (alcohol) ma happen in that time, too. Overdue.

But man, I always feel "brought up" (encouraged, cheered up) around others I see, and then the neighbors to either side, they seem MORE miserable than me.

Can't describe it

Either way. Sobriety has to happen. I've been sick as a dog for four+ months, and I seriously have no qualms/hesitation on going, I just have to do so in Farmington.

Anyway, hope all are well. Until later..



Hey, man. Maybe you could chat with our friend pr1ba over at that table. He was celebrating 50 days sober last week. Maybe you can support each other. I don't know what that feels or entails, so I'm not sure I'd be great help.

I'm rooting for you, though. For your needs and accomplishments!



Deepest gratitude, thank you :)

I sure will



For kicks and experimental giggles try meeting every thought to imbibe with the thought that it isn't something you do.


And again.

And again....




My enviro is dogshit, hence the hyper push to Farmington. The loss of progress with that in Nov was a dropkick to my soul. Barely survived.

But yea, neighbors are bong water batshit. Up is down, day is night, etc. I'm nuts too. But in my case *I* am nuts and wish to deal with that. And only that



The hellishness of other people was established by some famous philosopher long ago. French, I think. Whatever.

In this moment there's only thoughts of this moment. The one that matters most is that one might be able to seduce them another direction. If a hook doesn't work, try a crook. Or anything that works.

Or just give the fuck up.

I'd prefer you don't do the latter, because our interactions have been something I've enjoyed for several years, now, and am looking forward to more.

And, yeah, maybe I'm too candy-assed to be able to fully understand. I get that. But we're a bunch of different people going through all kinds of different shit, and believe it or not yours isn't the only FUCK ME situation.

Calm down, take one thought at a time, see there's a deeper awareness beneath all the personality mayhem, and realize you're that deeper-ness.

Stay there. Give the stupid-assed world drama up. BE.