That is a valid decision. I think the decision ( or the wish) of parenthood entirely depends upon the kind of parenting the said person has been through. For me, I guess I would like to be there for someone same way my dad did.
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That is a valid decision. I think the decision ( or the wish) of parenthood entirely depends upon the kind of parenting the said person has been through. For me, I guess I would like to be there for someone same way my dad did.
Wish I hadn't. Had no idea what I was doing, and wasn't with someone who could have helped/challenged me in a direction that might have ended well.
Instead, there's likely permanent disassociation, and given what I know (or is it believe?) about how stories develop unassisted by those closest to ground zero of what inspired them, I can't imagine the possibility of getting "back on track".
It's just over. And it's sad because I think I have the skills to communicate with sufficient nuance. But I've no faith in others willingness - let alone ableness - to dive deeply into what others actually mean, i.e. beyond one's own meanings/interpretations/biases.
And, of course, that lack of faith would likely doom any possibilities even if said willingness/ableness were present at the other end of the waxed string whose wax has mostly melted.
My father was pretty much the opposite of ~orchard's father. Everything was behind schedule and over budget. I know I will not reproduce. As I grow older, I cannot help but understand more and more why people have kids in the first place however.
I sort of see it (having kids) as sort of a "immortality project", as one person I know put it. Or, a type of living legacy. I mean there *are* other reasons to have kids, but I never much liked kids or *being* a kid back in the day, really. I always wanted to be older, and when I was around 24 or 25, I sort of breathed a sigh of relief like: "damn, I am glad I survived all that!" A lot of tumultuous times and struggle in my younger years, and in regards to economic status, that is still basically the case now, and I wouldn't put that on a life that didn't ask to be brought into this world.
It's a better way for me, though. To be w/o kid and just "do whatever" with my life/time. A lot of ambiguity and indifference towards many things I would otherwise have to concern myself with. So, it works out in the end :)
~bartender, another instant coffee and a beverage for those present, as well. May you all have a nice night :):)
It's an ego trip and an entirely selfish thing. Few people manage to be survived by their works. Having an affinity for something doesn't mean you're good at it. Sometimes people get lucky, and things work out for the better. If people only got what they deserved the world would be a terribly boring place.
Barkeep, I could use a White Lady over here. And a saucer of cream for Smudge if you've got any.
I'm 44, and I haven't had children. Just cats, and recently a dog. It's not that I didn't want to have kids; if I was determined to not have kids I would have been more consistent about wearing condoms.
Instead, my wife kinda wanted kids, and I was OK with it if it happened. We certainly had fun trying, but it just never worked out. Probably a good thing, to be honest.
hey ~starbreaker, I think when I was 19/20 I was "open" to the idea of having kids, because I was a gung-ho traditionalist who was in the military, and if I found someone who I fell for, I would have been a-ok with having a kid with them. The military was brief, that line of thinking was even *more* brief, and I didn't "go for" the idea of having a kid for very long after that. It was going to be a "just the thing you do" type of situation, which some find themselves in, and then go 100 steps into it, find unhappiness, and sort of wish they had applied their own thought all along.
Anyway, I am glad things worked out as they did, and as they continue to :)
Stay well